Sunday, November 25, 2012

Dates with Evie

Our household has been a busy one lately.  Kemi has been traveling quite a bit, and it's been challenging for me to find ways to not just manage, but stay positive and see the silver lining when things are so very hectic. I often have to remind myself (sometimes daily) that Kemi's job (that requires him to travel about 200 days a year) and my job (that requires at least 50 hours a week of my attention) are choices we made after careful consideration.  We made the choice after Evie was born, to continue our work schedules in much the same way they were before, for a multitude of reasons that I won't get into now.  Lately, it's been difficult being alone with Kemi gone almost every weekend, and I was finding myself feeling overwhelmed when Monday came and I hadn't once left the house or had any time to relax.  The weeks were starting to run together, and I could feel myself getting into a funk. Don't get me wrong...I LOVE being a mom, and love my time with our little girl, but when Kemi's gone, I still have to work each day, and keep up the house, and be the sole caregiver to Evangeline. It can become a little overwhelming for me to be so my students, employees, daughter, husband, family... Sometimes I can feel myself running on empty, and I know I need to do more to "fill up my tank" so to speak, so that I have a better outlook.
One simple solution that has helped me a bit is to have a Saturday morning coffee date with Evie. Even though it can be difficult to get out the door with an infant, I'm finding it's really necessary for me to just get out, see new faces, and have a few minutes to just concentrate on smiling at Evie, sipping coffee, and people watching. Drinking a reallly good cup of coffee is one of my favorite luxuries, but one I don't often let myself spend the money on, so it really is a treat for me. And it makes me feel like a better mom knowing that even if I have to drag Evie on errands all weekend or take her into the school with me, I've carved out a few hours to simply smile and look at her, and have her look back at me. It's been really good for my sanity to carve out for myself two hours of time to do absolutely nothing and not feel guilty about it.  As Evie gets older, I would like to keep up the tradition, but definitely gear it around things Evie will be interested in and let her choose our date each week. Being a working parent, I think it will be really important to have time carved out that's special time just for the two of us.

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